


The Devil In Me

by smuttyscribbles



Category: The Walking Dead (TV)
Genre: Because I caaaant, Choking, Daddy Kink, Dirty Talk, Dom/sub Undertones, Dubious Consent, Explicit Language, Explicit Sexual Content, F/M, Glenn Rhee Lives, Oral Sex, Reader-Insert, Rough Sex, Spanking, Starts at beginning of S7, Strong Female Characters, Vaginal Sex
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2017-10-16
Updated: 2017-10-16
Packaged: 2019-01-18 04:41:13
Rating: Explicit
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 10,433
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/12381096
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/smuttyscribbles/pseuds/smuttyscribbles
Summary: You cant let anyone else die tonight, not by the hands of this monster who calls himself a Savior. Giving yourself up seems to be the only way to distract him enough to help you all survive. You just never imagined that handing over your soul would feel very much like handing over your heart.





	The Devil In Me

The night is brisk but panic warms your cheeks even as the clouds of your breath whiten the air. You stare, wide-eyed, at the men holding Daryl down and try not to replay the image of what just happened in your head, even though the effort is futile. You can feel the fracture tonight has created within your group and know that after the punch Daryl just threw, it’s only going to worsen. The look on Negan’s face is proof enough. The man you had hunted, had thought that you’d bested, is the devil incarnate, and Daryl has just made him furious.

The sounds of panicked breaths and terrified crying come from everyone on their knees in the dirt beside you. A small rock on the ground is digging into your knee, a sharp point pressing through your jeans that is slowly becoming more and more distracting the longer you kneel. You don’t shift for fear of drawing his attention, even though you know it’s too late for that. He knows you’re there and has met your eyes a dozen times already.

He opens and closes his mouth to work his jaw, obviously feeling the hit, and starts spewing words of punishment and lessons. Talk of _keeping his word._ You glance around, understanding what’s going to happen seconds before everyone else does. Fast enough that you catch the way that blood-soaked bat in his hand swings up, promising not only to turn the fracture into a break but to crush everything you had all worked for all these years.

“Wait!”

The scream tears from your throat loud enough to hurt. You shouldn’t have spoken, he told you all not to speak, but you couldn’t have kept it in if you tried. The bat pauses within millimeters of Glenn’s head as Negan swings his sharp gaze towards you, his mouth quirking up in an extension of his sadistic grin. This man is more of a monster than anything waiting to shred your skin and chew on your insides. The proof is in that smile. The glint in his dark eyes that tells you he’s ecstatic that you’d given him even more reason to hurt you all.

“Excuuuuse me?” He practically sings, swinging Lucille your way and spraying a line of Abraham’s blood in the dirt. Glenn’s chest heaves with his frantic panting, the realisation of how close he was to death making him pale. He flashes you a desperate, wide-eyed look, obviously not sure what you’re doing. You have no idea either, so you spare him any fake reassurance and turn your gaze back to Negan. “I’m pretty sure I told you motherfuckers to stay fucking quiet. Didn’t I? Now look, you’ve interrupted Lucille’s favourite time of day.” He gives you an expectant look, one eyebrow lifting as he stares at you, his already gravel-toned voice turning deeper as he adds, “You better have a fucking good reason for that.”

You take a breath, forcing air into your lungs as more words tumble from your mouth without a real thought, as if your mind knew you couldn’t acknowledge them for fear they would stick in your throat. “Take me.” Your belly is clenched tight in fear and the last thing you really want is to be near him but the only way you can think of to stop this is by appealing to the primal male complex that he obviously takes delight in. You aren’t stupid after all, you’d seen the way he had been looking at you and knew there was more he was interested in than smashing in your skull with that fucking bat.

Negan’s smile stretches impossibly wide and he lets out a long whistle before laughing merrily. He looks over at his men, a suggestive expression on his face. “Hear that? This piece of fine fucking ass wants me to _take_ her. What sort of dirty girl would want that, hm?” he laughs loudly still, his men joining in, even the ones still struggling to hold Daryl down. He looks over at you again, his teeth digging into his bottom lip as his gaze rolls slowly down your body as though he hasn’t you in a few times already.

“Take me with you. Please. Let these guys go back, make them work for you, but take me. No one else has to die but taking me will hurt them just as much.” You plead, desperate not to see Daryl’s mistake end in someone else’s death. You know it would destroy him and you’d give anything to save him from that.

Negan clicks his tongue and slowly strolls towards you, dirt and gravel crunching under his boots as he stops within arm’s reach. Holding his gaze makes your heart pound but you force yourself to stay strong, know that a man like this craves a challenge, even if he pretends not to. Besides you’re going to need to be an iron pillar of strength if he takes you up on your offer, so you may as well practice now. The stone is still beneath your knee, the biting pain it’s causing now feels as insignificant as Abraham’s life was to Negan.

He lifts the bloody bat and skims the end up over your chest and neck until it settles under your chin. The wet smear of blood against your skin doesn’t go unnoticed and you have to let out a breath through your nose to stay relaxed, even as your molars begin to ache from where you’ve been clenching your jaw too hard.

“You know what I’m going to do to you if you come with me?” He asks, arching an eyebrow at you as his expression turns from crazed to lustful and somehow the switch darkens the look in his eye, making you wonder what you’re setting yourself up for.

You swallow thickly and nod your head, “Anything you want.” You say firmly, hoping that convinces him to go along with it at least. You know what you’re offering, everyone here does.

“Let me get this straight.” Negan licks his lips, heat filling his tawny eyes. “To save your people, you’re going to come with me and let me do anything I want to you? I need to make sure we’re on the same page, I’m big on consent.” He wags his eyebrows, the irony of his words not missed by you. How could anyone really offer consent when the fear of death is held over their heads? You know he’s aware of it too and that somehow, this faux concern regarding consent is just another game to him.

“Yes. I agree to whatever you want.” You nod even more, clearing your throat, “I want it.” You add, the words sliding easily from your tongue when you think about saving Glenn’s life because you do want it, offering yourself up like this is nothing if it means everyone else gets to live.

Negan throws his head back with a loud laugh, rocking back on his heels as he enjoys the scene. When he lifts his head again he winks at you, “You’ve got yourself a fucking deal, sugar.” He pulls Lucille away, heading over to stand in front of Rick, “Well I dunno about you but I’ll say you’ve not been treating that fucking hottie over there the way you should’ve been. She’s so eager for a fuck that she’s bargaining with little ole me. Didn’t you give it to her good, my friend?”

Rick slowly lifts his head, blinking teary eyes as he stares at Negan, his expression so filled with hate that it makes you wince. He opens his mouth but nothing comes out, which only amuses Negan even more.

“Cat got your fucking tongue?” his tone darkening, Negan crouches and gets in close, staring into Rick’s eyes and holding his gaze until your leader drops his in a submission you’ve never seen from him before. “You’re fucking lucky you’ve got that sexy little bargaining chip over there because if she hadn’t had the big ole set of swinging balls to stand up, you’d have yourself another body to bury. I’m not done with you, Rick. Not fucking close.”

You take a breath as he stands up, motioning for all his men to clear out. “Daryl comes with us. Put him in the van.” He orders, watching as the two holding him down fight to get him in the back of the vehicle, holding his own crossbow on him to keep him compliant. You hold back the tears, almost choking on the lump in your throat as Negan walks over to you, reaching down a gloved hand. “Up you get, sweetness. Daddy’s got a juicy plan for you.” He smirks, white teeth flashing from behind his lips.

It takes you a moment to fight the disgust you feel before you reach up, holding his hand with a faked strength as you stand. The relief from the pain of the stone doesn’t even register. You turn to look at your family but barely get a glimpse when Negan grips your chin tightly enough to ache and holds your head steady, “Don’t you fucking looking at them, sweetheart. You only have eyes for me now. I own you.”

You needed that moment to say goodbye. To look at them and have them know that you love them and that whatever comes next is all just in the name of survival. Not just yours but theirs too. You wanted to reassure them, even though you know deep down that they all understand why you’ve done this. Negan isn’t going to allow you that moment though, that much is obvious. You stare back at him until he grabs the back of your neck and leads you towards one of the vans, his grip tight enough to pinch at your skin.

When the two of you reach a van he yanks open the door and pushes you up into it, wedging you right in next to the overweight, sweaty driver who gives you somewhat of a shy smile. Negan gets in beside you, his leather jacket creaking with his movements as the scent of blood fills your head, reminding you of pennies and your last days with your family from before. You lick your dry lips, going over all the good things that happened during your time with the group, enjoying the last of your happy memories. You don’t know if you’ll survive the next few weeks, but at least you’ve bought them time to come up with a plan.

“What’s your name?” He asks bluntly, “Since you’re fully aware of who I am, it’s only fair.”

“It’s Y/N.” You answer simply and he just nods his acknowledgment.

“Get this bitch on the road, Fat Joseph.” Negan taps his hand on the dash a few times as the van judders to life and Fat Joseph peels out after the others. “Now, just where am I going to start with you?” Negan purrs, leaning back in his seat and lifting a leg to rest his boot on the dash. He reaches out to stroke your cheek with the back of his hand, the buttery leather of his glove soft against your tear-stained skin.

“A shower would be nice.” You answer, your voice a bit croaky from crying. You need to wash the sweat and blood from your skin and try to scrub the upcoming shame away too while you’re at it.

Negan hums, obviously not too impressed with your answer. “You’re probably right. I want that fucking pussy nice and fresh.” He chuckles deeply, not taking his eyes off of you even when your nose scrunches in revulsion. “I always like coming away from a bunch of stupid fucks with a nice little prize.”

You slide your gaze towards him, arching an eyebrow as you take in the image of the monster you guys had been trying to fight. You hadn’t imagined he’d look like this; a tall, toned man with a strong jaw, salt and pepper scruff and dimples when he grinned his malicious grin. The hint of lunatic behind those amber eyes just topped it all off.

“Seeing something you like, darlin’?” He smirks, dragging his teeth over his bottom lip again. His thumb rubs over your mouth, strumming your bottom lip for a moment, “’Cause I sure as fucking hell am.” He pushes his thumb passed your lips and presses down on your tongue, the ideas of what to do to you practically flashing over his face as the taste of old leather taints your mouth. “How the hell did you stay looking so fucking sweet, sugartits? This is the goddamn apocalypse and you’re out here looking like a fucking model”

He takes his hand away as if expecting an answer but you don’t say anything, not even sure what there is to say to that. Negan’s hand slips to your neck, fingers skirting down over your chest and toying with the neckline of your sweat-soaked tee.

“Isn’t she fucking delicious, Fat Joseph?” Negan purrs, his eyes flicking to the man on your other side. Fat Joseph splutters, looking over before quickly looking back at the road again. Negan’s hand drifts to one of your breasts, squeezing the soft flesh and giving it a shake.” He laughs heartedly, “I bet you’d give your left nut to have a go on these, wouldn’t you?”

You have to grit your teeth to keep yourself from saying anything, knowing that with men like this, making you feel small is a part of their plan. It happened before the world went to shit and it sure as hell hasn’t changed since. He wants you feeling vulnerable, like nothing more than a toy for him to do as he pleases, but you won’t let him do that. You haven’t survived this long without becoming a soldier in your own right and you won’t let him make you weak.

“I, uh, well I-“

“Calm down Joseph.” Negan laughs, letting go of your chest and leaning his back against the window of the van, his eyes focused fully on you. You stare out of the windscreen, not paying him much mind as you watch the sun come up, orange leaking over the horizon like ink in water. “It’s not like you’re going to get the chance any time soon. Keep your fingers crossed for her boring me and you might get a go.”

The scoff leaves your mouth before you have a chance to reign it in and the moment of silence afterwards couldn’t be any more deafening. Your heart continues its sprinting pace beneath your ribs, still beating so fast that you can almost feel the muscle itself tiring. You can’t help but wonder if it might just give up, flickering out your life like it’s nothing more than a candle flame in a breeze.

“Something funny, doll?” Negan drawls, that dangerous flare in his tone again.

You look over at him, your eyes landing on the pink of his tongue resting between his teeth and his bottom lip. You force your gaze up to meet his eyes, the intensity of them not going unnoticed. That voice in your head screams _monster, monster, monster._

“You won’t get bored.” You state, the confidence in your tone surprising you but you make sure not to show it.

Interest brightens his eyes and that tongue swipes over his bottom lip before disappearing, “I have a feeling you might be right.”

 

                                                                                                                    _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _

 

 

The rest of ride is silent and you count your blessings because you need every moment of it to gather yourself. It had confused you at first as to why they hadn’t blindfolded you to protect the route but you quickly realised it was because they were confident enough that you wouldn’t escape. Wouldn’t even attempt to. You can’t help but imagine how many times they’ve torn a group apart like this to gain such surety in their actions.

You make note of the way, storing the information in the back of your mind even as you spend the trip psyching yourself up for the inevitable and focusing on your plan of survival. You’ll use your body to draw him in and try to get him enraptured enough by the sensations between your legs that he’ll eventually start letting his guard down a bit. Men are inherently weak when it comes to sex but even so, you know you’ll have to make it special enough to impress him. Once you’ve gained some trust, you can start to gather as much information about The Saviour’s and their fortress as possible to use against them later. If you can find out their patterns, their hierarchy, where they keep their weapons, you can do a lot a damage.

When your destination starts to come into view, you can’t help but lean forward in your seat to get a better look out of the windscreen. The place is huge – an old factory of some sort – and immediately you’re reminded of your days back in the prison. A better time for a while, until another man with the same kind of god complex showed up to destroy it.

Walkers surround the fence, chained to cars and posts or stuck through with sharp poles like skewered kebabs, their rotting flesh falling from their bones like slow-cooked meat and landing in stinking piles on the ground around their feet. _Smart move_ , you think to yourself, though you still have to wonder how long a few measly walkers will work in keeping others away.

“Home sweet home!” Negan coos, having been watching your reaction as Fat Joey brings the truck to a slow stop, leaving the engine idling for a few shuddering moments before switching it off completely. “Aint it great?”

You blink and lean back again, giving a little shrug that you know irritates him, He wants a reaction, awe and amazement, something to kindle the roaring fire that is his pride and being the stubborn female that you are, you don’t give it to him.

“Get out.” He growls, stepping from the truck and grabbing your arm to pull you with him.

You stumble a little as your feet hit the ground and the hand of your arm squeezes tighter, holding you upright so you don’t fall flat on your face. The groaning of the dead is the first thing you really hear. It’s the sound that haunts your dreams and fills your head even when there are no walkers around you, like in the time before when you used to hear the peculiar chirping tone of the telephone at the pet store you worked at even when you were at home, settling down for the night and far away from the weekend job that seems as though it was in another lifetime at this point. 

“Simon, take care of things for me today. I’m gonna be pretty damn busy enjoying my new toy.” Negan smirks, bringing a hand down on your ass in a sharp slap to punctuate his sentence, as if everyone in his convoy wasn’t already aware what he was talking about. “This is a strict, do not disturb scenario.” He goes on, “If we’re interrupted, someone better be dead because if not, someone’s gonna be dead. Got it?”

“Got it.” The guy with the moustache – Negan’s second in command it seems – chuckles with amusement, “Have I told you I’m jealous?” He adds playfully, making Negan’s grin widen even more.

“You don’t need to tell me, I know every one of you motherfuckers is wishing you were me right now.” He takes a final glance over all his men and the few women that you hadn’t noticed earlier, “Especially Arat.” He teases, winking at her before leading you away to the sound of quiet laughter.

You don’t really know how to react to it all, so you just stay silent and take it all in as the two of you walk through a heavy metal door and into the factory. He doesn’t stop to show you around, which you’re not overly surprised at. He’s obviously not thinking about giving you a tour right now. You walk down a lot of grey corridors, their linoleum floors so clean they reflect the bright white light from the fluorescent bulbs running along the ceiling. It’s a good thing too, because every person you come across immediately drops to their knees in Negan’s presence, bowing their heads in a subservience that makes you feel sick, nausea rolling in your belly like a boat on a stormy sea. He doesn’t even acknowledge them, just continues to lead you with a hand on your lower back, whistling a tune as his bat swings by his side, dripping blood onto the floor someone had no doubt painstakingly scrubbed already that morning.

“This is Sanctuary.” He says, throwing his arms wide to motion to everything around you. The name strikes you as amusing in a rather dark way. There’s a class divide here that’s so glaringly obvious that you know it can’t be considered a haven to every resident. Although perhaps you’re wrong, it’s possible that they consider any place that can stop the walkers coming in to be a sanctuary of sorts.  

“Here we are.” He murmurs when you stop at one of the many doors you’ve come across. This one is no different, not special in any way other than unlike the others, which came close together, this one was the only door in this stretch of hallway. He turns to give you a heated look before reaching out and twisting the doorknob. The door swings open, not locked, though you guess the people here fear him way too much to come snooping.

The room is more glamorous than you had expected, hell, it’s even colour coordinated and set out like it belongs in a design magazine. On the right side, a seating area is made up with a plush grey couch, a coffee table and two equally as luxurious armchairs. There’s a side table with decorative trophies and even some bright green pot plants that you’re pretty sure must be fake. The head of a gazelle is hung on the wall, its beady black eyes following you as you move further in, judging you it feels like, even as you judge Negan for his choice in décor. You have no idea what prompts someone to put a stuffed gazelle on their wall, even in this day and age. On the left of the room, a huge four-poster bed takes up most of the space, the sheets a matching grey and the pillows looking obscenely plump. There’s a dark wooden armoire across from it and a matching chest next to that; a place for his clothes and whatever else he keeps in here. Perhaps a little bed for his Lucille, complete with grey sheets and pillows. There’s a door on that side of the room that has been left ajar, seemingly a bathroom from the look of the shiny white tiles and the gleam of a mirror.

“Now I know you must be impressed.” Negan drawls, obviously bored of your silent inspection.

Your boots make a muffled sound against the carpet as you head over to the door, pressing your palm flat against it and applying enough pressure for it the swing the rest of the way open. You peer inside, your eyebrows lifting at the sight of a large walk-in shower. You have no idea how they managed to get this place looking like this. The compound was an old factory, not one of those modern apartment buildings where this room would actually fit in. You can’t help but wonder what the other people living here got, whether they were treated to similar luxury, but you doubt it.

You turn on your heels, looking over at where Negan has settled himself in one of the armchairs and is unwinding the barbed wire from around his bloody bat. His eyes are focused on you though, even as he gets the wire loose and sets it on the coffee table, chunks of scalp and drops of blood colouring the glass. He notices your gaze on the gore and flashes you that huge, dimpled grin again.

“Messy job, this being in charge, but someone’s gotta do it.” He says cheerily. He swings Lucille in your direction, pulling your gaze to the bat again, “Take off your shirt.” He demands, that tone still unnervingly bright, even though you can sense the seriousness behind the order. If you don’t do as he says, you know he’ll just try and put you in what he perceives your place to be.

Your fingers dance along the hem of the ratty white t-shirt you’re wearing, curling in the fabric before you lift it over your head. The material is damp with sweat and clings to your skin a little before you pull it free and let it hang from your fist. Negan’s tongue swipes over his bottom lip, his teeth catching the flesh for a moment as he stares at you as though you’re completely naked rather than in your bra, jeans and boots. He makes eye contact again after a moment and silently holds out one hand.

A muscle in your jaw jumps but you take the few steps that he’s wordlessly demanding and swing your arm forward, letting go of the shirt so that it lands in his palm. His fingers shut quickly, clutching the material in his claws, and his lips quirk again as he wraps the shirt around the baseball bat and begins to wipe her clean of the blood of your friend.

“Lucille here might fucking love being my dirty girl, but in this room she’s gonna hand that title over to you.” He wags his eyebrows up at you, amused by his own words.

You cock your head at him, your eyes flickering over his face as you just observe his personality. You can’t help being a little fascinated by him; a lone man who has somehow corralled so many into being his good little girls and boys. You’d do anything to know what he was in the world before, how he lived his life then; if this was the man hidden beneath that façade or if this personality is the smokescreen.

“You don’t talk much. How boring.” Negan hums, pressing his lips into an unhappy line that makes you realise that you’ve been in your own head too much, a habit you’ve struggled braking recently.

“Wouldn’t want to steal your thunder.” You answer quickly, raising an eyebrow at him in your own version of the expression he wears so well. “You seem rather fond of talking.”

His eyes flick up to your face, his expression blank for a moment before he laughs heartedly, pointing at you with that damn bat again. “Right you are, doll.” He beams, setting the now clean Lucille down on the other armchair before he stands up, shaking out your t-shirt and holding it towards you. The white fabric is smeared with a shocking red now, completely ruined. “Here, you can have this back.” He winks.

You snatch it from him, not even looking down at the shirt before you bundle it together and chuck it towards the trash can by the door. It lands mostly in the can, one blood-soaked sleeve hanging over the lip.

Negan licks his lips again, his whiskey coloured eyes warm with seemingly incessant amusement. “You are something else! I am going to have _so_ much fun with you.” He chuckles, rocking back on his heels as he reaches for the zipper on his leather jacket, pulling it down so slowly that all you can hear is the sound of the teeth separating. “Now, normally when I have such a beautiful girl in my room, so eager and fucking _willing_ , I don’t waste any time. Today though, since I’m such a kind and reasonable man, I’m going to let you take a shower before I have you. Let you wash away every motherfucking nasty thought about trying to one-up me that you’ve got going on in that pretty little head of yours.” He gives you a look that would have weaker men shaking in their boots, but since you had no plans of doing anything tonight, you just blink back at him with a bored expression. He shrugs off the jacket and lays it over the back of the armchair, staying silent for a moment as if he’s waiting for you to rush in with words of innocence.

“I’m not thinking about killing you.” You answer after a moment, when it’s clear he wants some reaction. “I’m thinking about fucking you.”

There’s a brief flicker of surprise on his face that you can’t help but take some pride in, before he’s all smirk again. “Now ain’t that something.” He purrs, sauntering up to you until he’s within arms-reach, “No beating around the bush with you. Speaking of beating a bush, what you got down there? Wild forest or bare ground?” he reaches for the waistband of your jeans, tugging enough to pull you forward a step.

You roll your eyes before you can stop yourself, pressing your hands against his chest and taking note of the firmness beneath your palms. “You’ll find out soon enough.” You say, turning around and strolling into the bathroom. You don’t even look back before shutting the door on him.

The moment of privacy allows you a second to take a deep breath and let the tears blur your vision again. You know there’s no point in giving in to the tears, the despair, but if you don’t do it now you might risk it happening at the wrong moment. He can never see you like this, if he does, all hope of overcoming him flies out of the window. You’re fully aware that he’s surrounded by sniffling, scared people and the only way to stand out is by refusing to become one of them.

Sniffing quietly, you scrub your hand over your eyes and head over to the shower, pulling the glass door open and reaching in to turn the knobs on. You undress as the water heats up, watching yourself in the mirror. Tear tracks part the dust and dirt on your face and dots of red are splattered over your skin. You look a mess really and you honestly don’t smell much better either after hours of fear induced sweating.

The steaming spray of water helps to wash it all away. You tilt your head up and let it fall on your face, soaking your hair and clearing your head for a moment. There’s a rack in the corner filled with body washes and hair products, a couple of disposable razors at the ready although you’re pretty sure Negan is more a straight razor kind of guy. You take your time soaping up your body and washing your hair until the slight tangy scent of sweat is replaced with musky sandalwood before uncapping one of the razors and grooming yourself until all that’s left is a neat triangle of curls between your thighs.

Having to drag yourself from the hot shower feels like hell, even though you’re aware that there’s much worse. You should be grieving, crying, not grooming and cleaning yourself for the monster that murdered your friend. You stare long and hard at yourself in the foggy mirror as you remind yourself what you need to do. Give him the night of his life, get close, gain his trust and do whatever it takes to get that chance at slitting his throat. No matter how long it takes.

The thought of what comes next suddenly hits you and the knowledge that you’re about to have sex for the first time since the world went to shit makes you frown. Your entire plan rests on him enjoying it so much that he wants more and yet you’re not even sure if you’ll be good at it anymore.

“Don’t even go there.” You whisper harshly to yourself, not wanting to get in the wrong mindset and fuck this up for yourself. You’re sure once things get started, you’ll get right back in the swing of things. You were a sexual person once and you’re sure you can fake the same kind of enthusiasm for this man as you did for the handful of others in your life.

You wipe the drops of water from your body and towel-dry your hair before taking another look in the mirror, happy enough with what you see and not dwelling too much on the circles under your eyes or the imperfections that used to make you nervous to be this exposed in front of other people. You fold your clothes neatly, not bothering to put any of it back on. You want to get straight to the point. The quicker it’s over, the better for you. Taking another deep breath, you summon up every ounce of courage and faux confidence you possess and pull the door open.

“About fucking time, darlin’, my balls are turning blue.” Negan drawls from his spot on the bed, lying back with his arms behind his head. He drops his head to the side to face you as you lean against the doorframe, his eyes widening when he takes in your naked body. “Fuck me.” He growls, sitting up quickly and scrubbing a hand over his beard. “Well aren’t you just the sexiest thing I’ve ever fucking seen.”

He stands and walks over to you, his boots thudding heavily on the floor with his fast steps. He’s lost the scarf while you were showering but everything else is still on, which makes you self-conscious for a moment until you see the look in his eyes. The pure lust they hold helps ease your nerves for a moment as they linger all over you. You’ve never been studied like this before and there’s something about it that warms your belly and flushes your cheeks. You give him what you hope comes across as a flirty smile before pushing away from the doorframe and walking the final steps towards him.

“Jesus fucking Christ.” He groans, his teeth digging into his bottom lip yet again, “Can’t fucking wait to have you bouncing on my cock, those tits are going to look amazing.” He reaches out to grip the back of your neck, holding you steady so you can’t back away even though you weren’t planning to. The fingers of his other hand move to rest on your collarbone, softly brushing over your skin as he lets them drift down over the swell of your breast before his thumb curls under, sliding over the full underside and up towards your nipple.

“Getting a little ahead of yourself.” You smile coyly, the brush of his thumb over your nipple makes your belly flip in anticipation and you’re not overly sure if it’s a good feeling or a bad one.

“Hardly. I’m hard as a rock for you already. Look at this body.” He growls as the hand on your neck moves up to cup your jaw, his thumb stroking back and forth over your skin before he pulls you in and covers your mouth with his.

A jolt of unease rushes through you, your body tensing as his lips press firmly against your own; his scruff tickling your skin. He kisses you once and then again before you realise you have to react in order to have him wanting more. When he goes to pull away you reach up to grip the back of his neck and tug him in again, turning the chaste closed-mouthed pecks to wet, deep kisses. Slow at first, even when it pulls a thick groan from his chest. His lips are softer than you imagined, even though the force behind them is firm. It’s barely a minute before you find your body heating up, the telltale signs of arousal flaring, and it surprises you because even though you had planned for this to be good for him, you hadn’t thought that you might enjoy it too.

“More.” You gasp softly when he pulls back to yank off the white t-shirt he’s wearing. His toned chest is covered with a spattering of dark fur and you take a moment to glance at the time faded tattoos on his skin.

Negan laughs, taking off his gloves quickly as you squirm, the action not entirely fake. “Don’t worry, doll. You’re getting more.” He growls, chucking them aside before grabbing a fistful of your hair and yanking you forward. His mouth clashes against yours as he kisses you with a ferocity you can’t remember experiencing before and it doesn’t take long for that small hint of arousal to flare into something bigger that tightens your nipples and creates an ache low in your belly.

You know you should fight it and even though you’d planned on this being good, you hadn’t expected it to be more than an act on your part. This man disgusts you but it’s been so long since you’ve been touched like this that your body quickly reacts to the dominant mouth on yours and the sharp tug of a hand in your hair.

“Fucking moaning for me already.” He groans against your lips and only when he mentions is do you hear the breathy whimpers of pleasure that you’ve been letting out. It’s not new for you; you had always been a vocal one but again, it shocks you how easily your body is responding to all of this. It’s embarrassing really and for the first time that night you’re glad that you are far enough away from your family so that you don’t have to try and look them in the eye after this. “You’re a needy little slut for daddy, aren’t you?” He smirks, turning you so that the backs of your knees bump the edge of the bed. “A girl like you needs a good, hard fucking at least once a day. Lucky thing you have me now, pet.”

“You talk so much.” You huff, licking your wet lips as your eyes flick up to his face. You don’t know how he’s going to take the attitude but he just gives you that dimpled grin and leans in to lick into your mouth in a kiss that’s so filthy is makes your belly clench. “Fuck.”

“Get used to it.”

He trails those hot kisses along your jaw as his hands stroke down your sides, his callouses rough on your soft skin. His arms slide around to your back and he locks them around you, pulling you in until your body is tight against his. Your breasts smoosh against his firm chest, the warmth of his skin bleeding into your body as he groans, kissing down your throat until you’re practically shaking with arousal.

“God-fucking-damn.” He grunts, licking a wet line up your neck before kissing you on the mouth again, his teeth pinching your bottom lip and tugging firmly. “You are amazing, little thing. Can’t wait to have me a good, deep taste.”

“Negan.” You gasp as his large hands come up to massage your breasts, his fingers plucking and tugging at your hard nipples.

“Don’t my name sound so fucking sweet coming from your mouth.” He chuckles deeply, obviously completely taken with the effect he’s having on your body, as if he doesn’t get this response often. He lifts your breast and dips his head down close enough for his breath to tickle your skin. “Say it again.” He growls, his dangerous tone making you shiver.

“Negan.” You sigh, gasping softly when he takes as much of your breast into your mouth as possible, suckling so firmly that it makes your nipple ache and throb, like it has a pulse of its own. The cries of pleasure tearing from your throat only make him laugh, the vibrations tingling through your sensitive skin. He wraps his lips around your nipple and pulls it taut before letting go with a pop, watching your breast bounce back into place.

“That’s a good girl.” He hums, doing exactly the same the other one.

He gets your nipples all puffy and glistening with his saliva before you manage to think again and get your hands on his belt. He makes a deep rumbling sound of approval, kicking off his boots as you get his belt and trousers undone quickly, shoving them down his hips along with his boxers. He helps by lifting one leg to pull his trousers off and then the other. You look down curiously, eager to see what you’re working with, and can barely stifle your gasp of surprise from filling the room. You can’t believe his cock is as appealing as it is; a good length and a hefty thickness, the foreskin already pulled back from the flushed head. He’s so fucking hard that it makes you squeeze your thighs together, your pussy clenching as though you can already feel him inside of you.

“Holy shit.” Negan grins, “You should see your face, right now doll. You’re looking at my cock like it can solve all your damn problems. I wish I had a camera.” He grabs a fistful of your hair and gives you yet another deep kiss, “Not that I’m ever going to forget that look.” He says, before shoving you back hard enough to send you flying onto the bed.

You grunt as you hit the mattress, bouncing before you settle and barely given any time before he kneels on the bed and grabs your thighs, shoving them up and out until your knees are close to your shoulders. You try to push away the embarrassment you feel when he stares down of your exposed pussy, that look of hunger on his face deepening into something that makes you feel like you’re entering dangerous territory. As if this night with him might affect you in more ways that you can know.  

“Look at this pretty little pussy.” He says, sliding his hands towards your inner thighs and using his thumbs to spread your lips open. “Fuck me. That is the most delicious looking cunt I’ve ever seen. It makes me huuuungry!” He elongates the word, chuckling to himself. “Tell me how long it’s been since you had this pussy filled.”

You lick your lips, the slow swipe of his thumb over your folds distracting you for the moment. It feels nice but you can’t help but wish he was touching more sensitive places instead of talking. “Before.” Is all you muster up with a little shrug to show it doesn’t matter much to you. The admission making him raise his eyebrows, his look of disbelief telling you that he doesn’t have the same nonchalance about it.

“You can’t be fucking serious. That long?” He snorts, sliding a finger between your pink folds, brushing it teasingly over your clit and then dragging it down to your entrance, tracing circles over it and luring out more of your wetness. Every movement speaks of a man that knows how to pleasure a woman and you’re not sure if you should be surprised or not. “I knew I was fucking drowning in pussy but I didn’t realise my services were needed elsewhere. My fucking bad. No wonder you were so eager to come with me, after seeing the boys you were grouped with, I bet you’re desperate for a real man.”

You fight the urge to roll your eyes so hard they roll right out of your head, “Is that what you think you are? A real man?”

Negan glances up with narrowed eyes, his finger tickling the sensitive skin between your clit and entrance and making your hips shift with the sensation, “That’s exactly what I am, doll. A real fucking man. You’ll learn that soon enough.”

You try not to scoff, which is made easier by the fact that his finger finds your clit again and this time stays with it, rubbing over the bud with a teasingly light touch. You suck in a shaky breath, your hips rolling up to try and get a firmer pressure that will help you forget about everything else just for the moment.

“Oh no you don’t.” He smiles, pressing his other hand down on your lower belly so you can’t move. “Look at this, your cunt is in dire need of attention, you’re fucking dripping already and I haven’t even done anything.”

“You’ve done plenty.” You answer, looking down at him as he catches your eye, holding your gaze in that same intense way he did earlier.

He lowers his head and swipes a slow, flat lick over your pussy, not for one moment pulling his gaze away from yours. You suck in a breath, biting down on your lower lip as the warm, soft touch of his tongue against your pussy makes your heart race. He does it again and again, tasting you slowly and holding eye contact until it makes you uncomfortable enough to turn your head away. That’s when the teasing turns into something else; his tongue pressing down flat over your clit and rubbing firmly enough to make your breathing stutter. He puts his mouth on you, sucking on your lips and clit before swiping the tip of his tongue between your folds.

You cry out softly, digging your teeth into your lip even harder to stop the sounds from slipping past. A slap to your thigh stings enough to have your body jerking, your head flashing towards him with an accusatory expression on your face.

Negan looks up at you, his lips shining with a mix of his saliva and your own juices, “I want to hear you, so don’t you dare try at keep quiet.” He growls before lowering his head again, latching onto your clit with his lips and sucking, his tongue lashing mercilessly over the lust-swollen bud. The sudden attention to your clit has the pleasure ramping up from enjoyable to intense and you can’t control the moans that tumble from your mouth or the way your back arches sharply up to the ceiling.

You grasp the sheets, tugging at the fabric as your breasts rise and fall with panting breaths. Negan pauses in his torture and you’re not sure if you’re happy about it or not. Your clit is throbbing steadily now and whether you like it or not you’re starting to get closer to losing your inhibitions with him. Losing your control. He nuzzles his face against you with a deep groan, his scruff rasping over your sensitive skin and making your nose wrinkle.

“You taste so fucking good, pet.” He purrs, pressing his tongue to your clit again and shaking his head from side to side. You whimper and one thigh twitches comically.

You hadn’t even expected this from him. You had been sure he’d be the kind of guy to get straight to the point, shoving a hand between your legs and fingering you for a good three minutes before using spit to lube you up and sliding his cock into you in a way that would make you wince and grit your teeth. Jimmy, one of your old boyfriends back in school, used to do just that until you’d decided you wanted more for yourself and dumped him. Selfish guys had a way of making sex incredibly one-sided and you couldn’t think of a person more selfish than the man between your thighs. A man who hails himself a savior in this doomed worlds.

You can feel the tickle of wetness rolling down between your ass cheeks and you can’t tell if it’s coming from you or if it’s his saliva but it pulls you from your thoughts and makes you prop yourself up on your elbows, setting one foot flat on the bed as you look down at him. He likes it when you watch him, the smirk he gives you makes the corner of his eyes crinkle and he makes a show of licking at your clit.

“Tongue fuck me.” You pant, wanting to surprise him again and also really wanting to feel yourself opening up around his tongue. Something glints in his eyes, it’s not the shock you really wanted but it’s enough to know that you’re affecting him in some way.

Negan pulls back a little, licking his lips, “What do you say, doll?” He drawls, pressing his thumb to your clit again and wiggling to keep up the pleasure. “I know you can ask in a much nicer way that will definitely convince me to give you what you need.”

You know what he wants immediately and after a momentary hesitation you give in, “ _Please_ tongue fuck my pussy.” You whine, your lips pursing in a pout before you even realise. 

“That’s my girl.” He purrs, dipping his head again and lapping at your entrance before slowly putting more pressure behind his licks that forces your body to start opening for him.

Your head drops back on your shoulders, “Ah fuck.” You moan, spreading your legs even more to urge him on.

He grabs at your thighs, pulling you in tight against his mouth as he starts to press his tongue deeper. The vibrations of his groans tickle you and make your toes curl and for a few moments you lose yourself to the sensation of being utterly devoured. Ironic really, considering that’s what you spend your days trying to avoid.

“Oh god. Yes. Negan.” You squirm, his thumb still paying close attention to your clit, pushing you closer and closer to the edge until you realise that’s his intention. “I’m close.” You gasp, reaching down at grabbing at his hair as you rock against his face.

“Beg.” He demands sharply, his thumb slowing instead of keeping up that consistent, steady pace that had the pressure building between your legs. “Beg me to come.”

“Please!” You whine without hesitation, too focused on the hot arousal pooling inside of you to care about anything else right now. You can’t remember ever feeling this good, not just because it has been so long but rather because no one you had ever been with had bothered to work you up like this. “Negan, please make me come.” It’s a rather pathetic attempt at begging but it works for him and his lips wrap around your clit again, suckling hard as he finally pushes two thick fingers into you.

Your orgasm hits you like a sledgehammer, the pleasure making your back bow as you cry out loudly. You suddenly remember why you used to love this so much. You haven’t had the time or privacy – the inclination – to masturbate in a long while and that fact forces this orgasm to be one that makes you shudder violently as it takes over your body, pulsing pleasure through every inch of you.

“Well _sheeeet_.” Negan laughs, pumping his fingers and pushing them as deep as he can, “Fuck, that’s a tight cunt. I can feel you squeezing me. Daddy must have made you feel real good. What do you say?”

You pant, dropping down to the bed again, unable to keep yourself supported, “Thank you.” You sigh, moaning still as his fingers curl inside of you and make you suck in a sharp breath. The stretch of them makes you ache in the best sort of way. “Let me suck you.” I blink up at him just in time to see him shake his head.

“Later. I need to fuck you.” He growls, pulling his fingers out and grabbing your hips, flipping you over easily and pulling you up onto your knees. When you move to push up on your hands, he grips the back of your neck and shoves you back down, pressing your cheek into the mattress. “Stay down.”

For whatever reason, instead of pissing you off, it just turns you on even more. Being pushed around by him is definitely not something you should enjoy but there’s a dark thrill coursing though you that makes you question everything that you are. He holds you down as if anticipating some sort of negative reaction from you, his grip only loosening a little when you let your back arch towards the bed and lift your hips a little higher.

“Good girl.” He rumbles, “Stay just like that.” The hand on your neck disappears and grabs your ass, his thumb spreading your ass cheek to give him a better view as he rubs the tip of his cock along your dripping slit. “Fuck that looks good.”

You huff softly, impatient now, and push your hips back, “Come on Negan.” You urge, wriggling a little until his hand comes down harshly on your ass, the sound of the slap filling the room and your gasp of surprise following.

“You’ll get it when I give it to you.” He chastises even as he lines up with the dip of your entrance and pushes inside.

The head of his cock pops in easily and he puts a bit weight behind his movement to push the rest of it inside, stretching you to what feels like your full capacity. It makes your nose wrinkle in slight discomfort at first, especially when he decides not to give you a moment to adjust. His hands grab at your hips as he pulls back almost all the way and shoves deep again.

“Holy fucking shit.” He groans, his grip on you tightening so much that you know you’ll be sore tomorrow. “Such a great pussy.” His thrusts quicken, the rubbing of his cock against your inner walls suddenly turning from sore to sweet.

“Oh god.” You groan as his hips begin to slap firmly against your ass, making your flesh jiggle enticingly. “Yes!”

“You like that don’t you?” Negan growls, leaning over your back and propping his hands either side of your head, the new position giving him even more leverage to pound his hips, his heavy balls slapping rhythmically against your clit. “Love getting fucked by the big, bad man. Your cunt is so fucking tight, baby, so hot and wet. You’re gonna be milking me in no time.”

You can hear the smirk in his voice but you can barely focus on anything other than the building pressure between your legs and the long, blissful drag of his cock with every thrust. He gets deep each time but every now and then he slams every inch into you and just grinds his hips, forcing the very air from your lungs and making you wonder if it’s possible to pass out from sheer pleasure. The moans tumble shamelessly from your lips, mingling with his own unfiltered groans and grunts; a symphony of pleasure filling the room with its unapologetic melody.

“Harder.” You gasp when the urge to really pound away the ability to think hits you, “Give it to me harder.”

“Fuck.” Negan leans back, grabbing a fistful of your hair and tugging enough to pull you right up off the bed. His other hand comes around to cup your throat, holding your body taut as he gives you all he’s got, pistoning his hips in a frantic rhythm that actually makes you yell. “That what you want?”

“YES!” You cry out, the pleasure taking over completely and for the first time since the start you feel nothing but bliss. A kind of euphoria that you never imagined you could feel again. The hand on your throat squeezes just enough to make you lightheaded and when it slackens a few moments later, you shudder all over, “Again!”

“Dirty little slut.” Negan moans, choking you again only this time for a few seconds longer, all the while thrusting into you at a breath-taking pace. “You better fucking come again. I want to feel you come all over my cock.” He tugs at the hand in your hair, the stinging in your scalp increasing as the hand on your neck slips between your thighs to find your clit and tease it mercilessly.

It even surprises you how eager your body is to obey him. Perhaps it’s the tension or the way this position has his cock pressing up against that spot inside of you that makes you want to sob it feels so good, but you know you can come again – _will_ come again. A first for you when it comes to the handful of other people you’ve been with. With them you were lucky to get one orgasm that wasn’t from your own fingers working your clit while they fucked you.

“Spank me.” You whimper, wanting that spark of pain again. Negan groans at the demand and the blows come quick and hard, the hand between your thighs moving to land three stinging slaps to your ass cheek before returning to the bundle of nerves and stroking faster circles. “Fuck!” You yell, gasping as the hot pain burns off into a flurry of tingles that makes that coil in your belly tighten to the max.

Negan’s hips stutter and you can hear him panting behind you, no doubt close to his end too. “Fucking Christ, pet. You know how to work a man up.” He says, “I can feel your cunt quivering.” He adds with a manly chuckle, the sense of pride so obvious in the sound. “Come for me!”

The order is said in a tone so firm and dark that you’re sure it must have just scared your body into responding. Either that or that sick part of you that’s still basking in the thrill of this enjoyed it enough to obey. Your cry of pleasure is so loud that you hope Negan’s room isn’t on a popular route through the building because it would have been easily heard out in the corridor. Your second orgasm is just as strong as the first and your thighs quake enough that he has to grab your hips again just to keep you on his cock.

“Fuck me.” He growls, “Holy fucking shit that feels good, baby.” He gives a few steady thrusts to keep your orgasm going as long as possible before he pulls out completely, letting you slump to the bed as you try to catch your breath. A firm hand rubs up your back and slides into your hair, “That’s a good little, pet.” He coos before easing you onto your back.

You blink up at him, your vision kind of hazy in the glow of your climax but the large form of his body hovering over you is hard to miss. His cock juts up between his thighs, glistening obscenely with your juices and flushed so dark at the tip that it looks like it must ache some. You can’t bring your mouth to form words as he pushes your thighs wide and dips his hips down to line up again. He sinks into you in one smooth thrust, your body accepting his so easily now.

“You’re going to look at me when I come inside of you.” He states clearly, holding your gaze as he pumps his hips. A brief worry flashes through you at the idea of him coming inside of you but it slips away as his thrusts overwhelm your sensitive pussy and make you whimper. Pleasure dances over his expression, slackening his jaw and creasing the space between his eyebrows and you can’t help but think how good he looks like this. He leans over you, his eyes boring into yours, “You belong to me.” He groans, his next thrust slower but harder, making your body bounce. “You are mine! Say it!”

You look up at him, trying to fight the urge to say the words. “Say it!” he yells again.

“I’m yours.” You gasp, grabbing at his biceps as he slams into you until his balls are pressed tightly against the crease of your ass and goes completely still, letting out a sound that you could almost describe as a roar as he floods you full of his cum.

He shivers, pressing his hips even tighter against yours even though there’s nothing left of him to take. It hurts a little in a way that you don’t even mind, even when he pulls back just enough to thrust hard again, obviously trying to wring out every last drop. He lets out a big sigh of relief when he’s done, his body going slack as he lets your hips cradle his for a few more minutes, not in a rush to leave your warm body.

“Best fuck I’ve had in years.” He murmurs and you’re not even sure he meant for you to hear it but you’re glad you did because not only does it give you a little hope that you might be able to fulfil your plan but it also boosts your self-confidence. “Great little prize.” He smirks, leaning down to kiss you slowly before he forces himself to pull out of you with an unhappy groan.

He flops beside you, the two of you staring up at the ceiling as you catch your breath, his cock softening wetly against his thigh. You take your time to comprehend everything, doing your best to ignore the way your entire body is still tingling and the liquid heat pooled low in your belly is demanding more, trying to make up for the stretch of time that you didn’t have this.

“Like it rough, huh?” Negan says a few minutes later, breaking the relative silence.

You roll your eyes and turn over onto your belly, propping yourself up on your forearms as you look at him. The sunlight coming in through the three large windows cuts across his body, highlighting the dips and grooves of his muscles as well as the rich colour of his eyes. He raises an eyebrow at your inspection of him, that mask of male pride settling over his face again.

“You gonna be ready for another round soon, old man, or are you done for the day?” You drawl, raising an eyebrow in copy of his own expression.

“Old man!?” He scoffs indignantly, although you don’t miss the slight amusement in his tone. He turns to grab you, pulling you onto his body and forcing you to straddle his lap. “I’ll fucking show you.”

And he did.

**Author's Note:**

> I hope you enjoyed!  
> This could possibly turn into a longer fic, I would love some feedback to let me know if its worth doing.


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